Warning: rather than a joy-filled, Christ-centered post, today I am sharing my real, raw and vulnerable thoughts. Sorry, I’m just keeping it real.
Hey Friends –
It started over Christmas break.
Rather than sleeping through the night, I would toss and turn and meditate on all the “worst case scenarios”. My mind was pelted with horrible fears, discomforting worry, and extreme anxiety. My lack of self-confidence and insecurities were at an all-time high.
I shared my concerns with a close girlfriend. After hearing the intense fear and lack of courage oozing from her normally upbeat, sparkly, encouraging friend – my friend finally declared, “Cindy, maybe you’re not ready. I’ve just not seen this side of you before.”
I agreed. My apprehensions were “through the roof”, so to speak, and I didn’t know what to do.
My only solution, I sensed, was to step back and quit. I just couldn’t do it.
Have you ever been there before?
Have you wanted to throw in the towel on a new opportunity, project, relationship, or dream?
Did it seem easier to step back into the safe, familiar and comfortable rather than step out by faith into the new and the unknown?
When was the last time you wanted to quit?
Thankfully I didn’t let fear and anxiety get the best of me -yet.
As terrifying as it’s been to step out into the new world of publication, I turned in my Red Hot Faith manuscript to the editor on Monday. In addition to the video teachings filmed on-site in Ancient Laodicea, I have officially written a Bible study/participant’s guide. Whew and thank You God. 🙂
It’s true that I still hear the voices of doubt and discouragement…
- “What if people write letters and say mean things to you?”
- “What if people think it’s not fill in the blank enough”
- “What if people mock your hair, your writing style, your speech, your you name it.”
It’s true that the lies still taunt me, but the Truth is – In Christ I am an overcomer, not a quitter.
In my next post I’ll share with you more specifically how I was able to keep going and not give up, and I’ll share how you can keep going too!
How about for you, friend? When was the last time you wanted to quit, and what helped you keep going? How did you overcome your current challenges? I’d love to hear from you!
Thanks for stopping by *She Sparkles*. Have a wonderful, joy-filled weekend!
Sweet blessings,
Ummmm… yesterday? That’s the last time I thought I should quit. But today isn’t over yet! Anxiously awaiting Part II!
I’m glad to hear I’m not alone – but whatever you do, please don’t quit, Amy! We need your passion and perspective to help transform our neighborhoods…one house at a time.
Love to you, friend!
I’m sooo glad you didn’t listen to those voices and held on to the Truth!! Love you friend!
Your encouragement has meant more than you know, Amelia. Thanks for reminding me to see it through to the end!
xoxo
Cindy, I’ve been there! EVERY time I’m about to speak at an event. Doubts and fears pop up. The voices in my head all seem to say, “Who do you think you are?”
But God called you to write this study and do the video. He will bless it too!
Oh Sharla, you still have fears and doubt pop up? I’m glad you don’t listen to the voices. The Truth you speak from your lips bless us!
xoxo
I get nervous of all the “what ifs” every time I think I might succeed. Self sabotage at its finest. Hang in there. We have a story to tell that brings Him Glory. That is all that matters on the bottom line.
Holly, those “what ifs” can be dangerous, can’t they? I love how Steven Furtick says to change our “what ifs” to “so what”. You are right about our bottom line. Thanks for sharing! 🙂
It is so hard to stand still while the Master chisels on us. My flesh wants to take my ball and go home, but He whispers to me to stand still while He works. So I wait on Him, sometimes with tears running down my cheeks, sometimes with the BBA (Big, Bad Attitude). I struggle to keep my attitude right. I imagine him sitting back and waiting on my tantrum to end so he can resume the important work on my soul. I hear you, girl! Praying for the voices of doubt and discouragement to be silenced as they are trying to silence good news and the glory of God. (Satan didn’t get the memo that the rocks will cry out if we don’t!)
Dear Dana, what a powerful reply! I’m saving this to reread on my hard days. Thanks for your love and prayers. Have I told you lately how glad I am for time together at SSI. You are an answer to prayer, friend! 🙂
the most arduous and lengthy struggle i had to endure was recovering from anorexia. so very hard to keep going. and then the daily perseverances, too. i am not great with follow-through. when i do finish things, it’s through god’s strength and a deep-seated desire to please others….
Kendal, I admire your courage, my friend! I’m so grateful that not only did you persevere and overcome your struggle with anorexia, but that you are now sharing your journey (and life) to help others experience victory as well. Bottom line, you rock, Kendal! 🙂
I soooo needed to read this today!!! I’m opening a private practice and I just signed a year lease on an office but have no clients! I know God is leading me in this direction but something I think… WHAT AM I DOING!!!
Love ya girlfriend!!!!
Crissy, yay for you! I can’t wait to see what God will do. I’m marking my calendar to check in one year from now for the full report! May God increase your faith and show Himself powerfully to you! What fun! 🙂
Fighting to keep anxiety out of life. It is hard to not quit when you want to stay hidden in your house, when you don’t know why this is happening and why you if you believe so much in Him is it creeping up inside of you, but I continue to fight. Quitting is easier, but fighting makes up stronger.
Amen, dear Courtney, Amen. You are right, quitting is easier, but I know you well enought to know you are not a quitter either. May God continue to build your faith muscles as you fight the good fight of faith. I believe in you, my friend, and I believe in God in you!
Fighting to keep anxiety out of life. It is hard to not quit when you want to stay hidden in your house, when you don’t know why this is happening and why you if you believe so much in Him is it creeping up inside of you, but I continue to fight. Quitting is easier, but fighting makes us stronger.
I pray God’s perfect love would cast out all fear! He’s got this one for you! You are called and He will equip, but it is SO frightening to be vulnerable. We are holding up your arms, dear Moses, because we believe in what He has called you to do!
Brenda, you are such an encourager! Thanks for your kind words and prayers. They are like a soothing balm to my weary soul. Bless you! xoxo
So glad you are not a quitter!! THank you for being so tranparent…In the year or so ago since I started following your blog, time and time again I have been so encouraged by your words as you share how life really is. I have been wanting to give up and run away from fear since mid December. I was approached about teaching a Bible study and even though I know that is part of God’s plan for my life I feel frozen in fear and anxiety. I know I can’t keep running away from the fear, I will face it and overcome-by the blood of the Lamb and the word of my testimony!
I had been missing your blog posts as they come to my email…I have been praying for you in the
Such an exciting time but I can definitely understand the fear and anxiety creeping in. Praying for you and so blessed to watch this journey unfold!
I have to admit that there have been times in my life where I have said…”I give up!…I can’t do this any more!”
BUT GOD! Those are the two words that turned things around…”But God”… He wasn’t finished with me yet! I may have given up…but He never did! (:>) Hallelujah!
And I know for certain he isn’t finished with you yet either…my sparkly friend! (:>)
Love, Linda @ Truthful Tidbits