Hey Friends –

Happy almost Valentine’s Day!

Although the whole world shouts, “Happy Valentine’s Day!” this weekend — I’m curious if it will be a “happy” day for you?

Whether married or single, female or male, rich or poor, young or old — Valentine’s Day is a day that has the potential of leaving us disappointed, utterly exhausted, and experiencing intense feelings of emptiness and isolation.

I wonder if you can you relate?

I’ll never forget my most agonizing Valentine’s Day.

In 1998, while in the midst of planning a dream wedding with my prince charming, a shocking tragedy occurred. I was left broken, devestated, and alone. Recap here.

feb 14Just eight short weeks after my life-altering phone call, February 14th marked the calendar.

I quickly realized I had a choice.

I could allow Valentine’s Day to intensify my raw, excruciating grief and spend the day in a puddle of self-pity and despair — I don’t think anyone would have blamed me — or I could choose joy.

I could choose hope.

I could choose love.

What did I do?

  • Instead of staying in my pajamas, I got up, dressed and asked God to help me walk through the day.
  • Instead of numbing the pain, I stood at my church in front of 2000 of my closest friends (smile) , and shared my story, including what a painful day Valentine’s Day was, but God was still good.
  • Instead of focusing on what I didn’t have, I spent the day reflecting on what I did have. Health. Family. Strength. Hope.
  • Instead of looking inward, I decided to focus outward. I spent the day with my favorite aunt making and delivering Valentine’s to friends who I knew might also have a hard Valentine’s Day.

Was my day still filled with heartbreak and tears?

Of course, yes.

But what could have been a horribly depressing day was filled with precious moments of tenderness, friendship, and affection in the midst of my heartbreak and sorrow.

You, my dear friend, have a choice on this Valentine’s Day as well.

  • Will you think about your significant other’s shortcomings or strengths?
  • Will you think about what you wish you had or what you currently do have?
  • Will you focus inward or outward?
  • Will you compare yourselves to others or choose contentment?

My friend Karen Ehman says, “Comparison kills our contentment.”

Let’s pinky promise we won’t even think about comparing ourselves to others on Valentine’s Day, ok?!

Who do you know who is alone this Valentine’s Day and might be having a stinky day?

  • Recently widowed woman from church
  • Single mom down the street
  • Friend in the hard marriage
  • College student
  • Gruff woman in your small group

I wonder if a quick phone call or text with the words, “Hey, thinking about you today and wanted to remind you that ‘YOU ARE LOVED'” might brighten someone’s day?

I-love-you-cardMay I challenge you to print off an awesome free printable from Beauty and Bedlam and prayerfully share it with at least one special person this weekend?

Download it for free here

Sweet friends, we don’t have to buy into the consumerism of Valentine’s Day —but today and every day is a great day to remind others that they are loved — just the way God made them!

What will you choose this Valentine’s Day?

Who can you remind of God’s love and goodness? I’d love to hear from you!

Happy early Valentine’s Day, my sweet *She Sparkles* friend.

You are LOVED!

Sweet blessings,



P.S. I’m so thankful that God brought John William Bultema into my life – and that the year after my painful Valentine’s Day, John was at my side. 🙂
…repost from the archives

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