Hey Friends –
Y’all know I’ve been having a hard time adjusting to my firstborn Jake leaving home to live with his dad & step-mom while he attends Aquinas College.
I should clarify – by hard time I mean major bouts of bawling my eyes out, melt downs on my bathroom floor, puddles of tears at night when I realize Jake’s not coming home and I need to go ahead and turn the lights off. That kind of hard time. :/
I am happy to report it’s been almost a full week since I’ve experienced a meltdown.
Woo Hoo for progress!
I’ll confess I did almost lose it last night when I went to set the table with 6 plates in my hand, and realized we only have 5 at our table now. Ugh. It was painfully hard to walk back to my cupboard and put that lone 6th plate away.
Sometimes letting go just plain stinks.
However, today I have fresh hope! I’m committing to letting go and going forward! 🙂
One of my suggestions to Jake as we embrace a new season was to meet for breakfast at his favorite local place – Wolfgangs. The owner’s wife also happens to be one of my super good friends. (She held my hand as I gave birth to Jake 18 years ago). Wolfgang’s is a special place with many warm memories for us both.
Jokingly I said to Jake, “We could have ‘Wednesday’s at Wolfgang’s’ – my treat!”
Would you believe that when Jake received his schedule he has Wednesday’s off?! Yay! Thankfully he also has hockey practice at 7 AM every morning (so he’s out of bed early!), and was more than willing to have breakfast with his mom at Wolfgang’s right after practice today.
The only thing he wasn’t happy about was “marking the moment” with my camera. LOL!
Jake let me sneak in one picture, but wasn’t going for my idea of a redo because of the shadow. Oh well…I’ll still treasure it always. 🙂
As I was driving home from Wolfgang’s, I was struck by my need to let go of what we’ve experienced in the past so I could fully embrace and move forward towards new opportunities.
If I keep hanging on and lamenting about “what used to be,” how can I keep my eyes, ears, and heart open to what God wants to do during this new season?
- I need to let go of Jake being under our roof – but going forward, I treasure the thought of having him to myself over breakfast for a full hour without any distractions every Wednesday.
- I need to let go of my desire to have Jake safe here “in my nest”, and instead look forward to watching how God grows him – spiritually, emotionally, and physically.
- I need to let go of control, and instead trust God as Jake makes decisions, new friendships, and begins a fresh season as a college student.
Sometimes letting go just plain stinks…but until I stop looking back I cannot move forward.
I’ve been thinking of other ways I wrestle with hanging on to the old rather than embracing the new….
I’ve declared it’s time to …..
- Let go of old, self defeating “tapes” & instead go forward confidently in courage and Truth
- Let go of how our family did things last year & prayerfully embrace new traditions and opportunities, as necessary
- Let go of how much I loved being the mom of a high schooler (& being a house where lots of kids hung out) and instead get an Aquinas College cow bell and get ready for some hockey!!!! WOO HOO! (AQ hockey schedule here)
Now is it going to be easy? Of course not.
Is it possible I have more meltdowns? You betcha.
But do I sense God is wanting to grow not only Jake during this season, but this mama bird as well?!. Sure do.
Sometimes growing pains are uncomfortable…but so worth the time, effort, prayers and tears.
How about you, friend? As we head into a new Fall season, are there habits, attitudes, actions or beliefs that you need to let go? Is it time to let go of controlling that relationship? Those self-defeating thoughts and behaviors? The fear that is holding you back?
Is it time to let go?
“God can’t put anything in hands that are already full.” —Chuck Swindoll
I’d love for you to share with us! How have you’ve exerienced growing pains during changes and transitions? What has God has taught you through them? Is there something you need to let go off??
Aren’t you so glad we don’t have to journey alone?
Thanks for stopping by *She Sparkles*! I thank God for you, my dear bloggy friends!Have a wonderful Wednesday!
Sweet Blessings –
Awww Cindy– this got me all weepy!!! And my little one is only heading off to KINDERGARTEN!!! Lol.
What a wonderful post. I could feel, so deeply, your emotion about putting that extra plate away and wanting Jake in the safety of your house…it must be a universal momma thing…
In a very different, but teensy weensy similar way I’m not wanting to leave Ava in the hands of the teachers at school for 6 hours a day…not unless I’m there to watch every moment of course!! She’s also starting to play more with friends and wanting to do things independently. I know it’s just the very beginnings of a somewhat long journey, but I also know (from all of you older and wiser moms!) how quickly its going to go…
Saying prayers for you. You are SUCH an amazing mom and have prepared Jake SO well for this new phase of life. The world (and his school and all the places he ventures off too) will be blessed to have him and the impact he will leave because of the hard work you have done all of these years!!!
Sometimes transitions are so hard. But walking through them is what gets us to the other side. Sounds like you’re headed in the right direction, Cindy!
What an inspiritng post!!! To all of it I say: “Thank-you God for answering our prayers for Cindy & her family! Thank-you that you allowed Cindy to go through “the deep waters” temporarily & now many will be blessed by her testimony”!!! Just confirms for me that we serve an Awesome GOD!!!
inspiring*
Thank you for this post. For the last 4 years I have lived with my sister and her husband and their 6 animals. During this time, my sister and I have grown closer than I ever could have imagined. I’ll soon be moving into my late grandmother’s home and I’m split on the move. On one hand I’m excited and looking forward to seeing how I’ll manage – with God’s help – living alone for the first time in my life. On the other hand, I know I’m desperately going to miss my sister and the animals (that I consider my “nieces and nephews”) and the companionship. However, I do realize it’s time to “go forward”, and the good thing is we’ll all still be in the same town! 🙂
I’m having to let go of “perfect” …..in fact today I had quite a sobering experience where the Holy Spirit was all in my business about letting go of my pride…..had to go and confess and apologize to three women. That’s always fun. But I feel like God is refining me in some deep and major ways – not fun but good for me, yes.
I thought of you when I read this:
http://kylenebeers.com/blog/2012/08/20/why-i-hated-merediths-first-grade-teacher-an-open-letter-to-americas-teachers/
Sometimes, life is h.a.r.d.